Grief

Our weekly postings here at http://www.e-hhw.com/ have been interrupted due to the final stages of my father’s terminal illness. We have not yet announced this blog—so I’ll temporarily use it as a venue for expressing my grief.

The inevitable loss with which I’m currently grappling involves the man who taught me to fish, to build a house, to train horses without domination, to define a circle (as I watched him use his back to provide for his family), and to respect our partner as much as we respect our self. And he taught these by example, not by instruction.

My heart feels as though it will rupture from the pain of the inevitable before me. Perhaps this immediate circumstance is exacerbated by the recent death of the woman I waited 44 years to find—my life was so briefly augmented from average to glorious (married February 14, 1997 and she died February 13, 2007). Perhaps I still have difficulty baring the loss of my partner—and wonder if I can endure the additional loss of my father.

I cannot know about the transcendence of soul—it’s a matter of belief—but know absolutely that our empirical existence is both glorious and devastating.